I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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