Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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