Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
