Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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