This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My vagina is officially offended.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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