All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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