this boner is exhausting
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
