Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i just google imaged poop.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
