Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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