Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
