Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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