In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
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