i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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