Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  are you still at the devil's house?

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  (248): are you still at the devil's house? http://tfl.nu/bw8z
  Replies (4) Good night (1530) Bad night (1973)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up

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  (517): I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up http://tfl.nu/4pw3
  Replies (7) Good night (768) Bad night (1359)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???

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  (404): I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone??? http://tfl.nu/6a5o
  Replies (30) Good night (1007) Bad night (4651)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.

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  (203): I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter. http://tfl.nu/8kyg
  Replies (290) Good night (63174) Bad night (4767)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"

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  (615): I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program" http://tfl.nu/jmw5
  Replies (9) Good night (1708) Bad night (3741)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.

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  (410): Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style. http://tfl.nu/gn5p
  Replies (9) Good night (3608) Bad night (1157)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.

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  (917): There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit. http://tfl.nu/4wxu
  Replies (7) Good night (801) Bad night (1984)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question

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  (570): I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me (1-570): How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question http://tfl.nu/l5jk
  Replies (11) Good night (948) Bad night (1657)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina

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  (902): Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina http://tfl.nu/gzz0
  Replies (4) Good night (1247) Bad night (484)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.

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  (336): You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed. http://tfl.nu/8v03
  Replies (3) Good night (931) Bad night (398)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.

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  (513): Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation. http://tfl.nu/lwvq
  Replies (3) Good night (1158) Bad night (381)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.

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  (785): His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less. http://tfl.nu/hesm
  Replies (4) Good night (1035) Bad night (366)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them

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  (617): Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them http://tfl.nu/p251
  Replies (3) Good night (708) Bad night (334)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.

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  (203): Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down. http://tfl.nu/cgfa
  Replies (9) Good night (1672) Bad night (370)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment

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  (817): I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment http://tfl.nu/ub19
  Replies (4) Good night (770) Bad night (263)

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