That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?