I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Randomize
