Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
