I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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