I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize