your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize