After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
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so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
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I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
i believe in u and ur pee
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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