Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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