That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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