You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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