This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
