I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Never joke about your clitoris.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
