clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Randomize