Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize