This is not my ceiling
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
