Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
When did angry sex become our thing?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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