that's an acceptable place to lick
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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