My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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