YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
