We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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