We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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