She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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