Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
