STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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