so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
