Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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