a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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