But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
