Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
