idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
