i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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