No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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