Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize