But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize