Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
