I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize