Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
